Ask Lugnut!

[Javelin]

Yes, you're reading this right! Welcome to the new Cybertronian Advice Column! Here you can safely ask "Lugnut" for advice on anything! Bored of living on Earth? Want to choose a new paint color? Not sure if that new weapon of death and destruction really goes with your frame? Just write in and ask Lugnut!



Free of charge!












All advice given is taken at the writer's own risk.

[Sparkplug]

Hey...? Found your posting node scrawled on a shower rack, with something about 'Confused? Ask Lugnut', and I thought to myself, hey, when was the last time taking advice from graffiti on a shower rack went wrong, so here we go:

I'm kind of new around my new base, and the mecha have generally been pretty nice to me, so that's been great. Thing is, I'm not sure where to look for a little more intimate companionship, you know? So, the superiors, they are right out, and the one with the purr is taken, the low ranks are all kind of... samey, and I might have scared off the big femme. I talk a lot. Got any advice for me? At this rate, I'm going to end up mooning over Autobots, for Primus's sake.

[Javelin]

Moving into a new area can be hard, and trying to find a new romance even harder! But don't despair, there is always a chance for love around the corner! The lower ranks looking the same can be a challenge! Find ways to make them different! Also, if you outrank them, they have to do what you say, which can also be fun!

If you don't mind being in a relationship where you are number 2, don't rule out the superiors just yet. Stand out by talking about things you know they like! Encourage them in their acts of violence and mayhem! Gush over their latest weapons!

Don't moon over Autobots. They are all taken.